Vegan problem number 9,657: Being a vegan for so long that one ounce of dairy can fuck your body up for days… We’re not baby cows!! Stop putting baby cow milk in food!!
- so do you eat fish?
is fish a fucking vegetable?
- wow, I could never do that!
I’m sorry, I must have given you the impression that I gave a fuck about you. I don’t.
- is *thing that is fucking obviously vegan* vegan?
- is *thing that is fucking obviously not vegan* vegan?
- how do…
Why is it considered so weird that I don’t eat cheese? Like you’re eating the fermenting puss and blood filled breast milk of another species during adulthood and I’M the weirdo? Hahahahaha no darling, no.
Veganism is a lifestyle.
Plant based eating is a diet.
Your “vegan fitness challenge” is NOT veganism, it’s a plant based diet for fitness.
If you eat a plant based diet but still live a cruel lifestyle outside of your food consumption, then it’s not veganism.
Say protein again
Go on, say it one more time
I fucking dare you
I feel like every year for my vegan anniversary I should just throw out a lot of confetti and go “I’M STILL ALIVE.” And my family will gasp in horror, and whisper quietly, “But how does she live without protein?”
having to talk like
"after I showered with vegan shampoo and vegan soap, I ate my vegan cereal with vegan milk, put on my vegan makeup, grabbed my vegan shoes and got into my boyfriend’s car (with vegan seat covers) and went shopping for vegan things, and then that night we went out to eat and I had a delicious vegan burger”
just so people won’t go “_____ isn’t vegan! CAUGHT you!” every three seconds